Hello Friends and Readers
Last post in July, nothing in August and here we are in the middle of September. All I can say is it's been a very busy time.
First, I finished the first round of Chemo I was going through. Good and bad news from that. Good news - the tumor in my breast is gone....Bad News, the tumors on my lumph nodes are NOT. Means I have another round to go with a different chemo. Had the first one of those late in August. The side effects are very different. First, the nausea is almost nonexistent, and that's good. Second, I developed something called "Hand and Foot Syndrome". Basically my hands and feet swelled and broke out with a rash that looked as if I had been scalded. Not really painful except when I tried to walk. Treatment? Take lots of Vitamin B6 and use something called "Bag Balm" a wonderful concoction that moisturizes with lanolin and seals the skin with a souped up Vaseline type substance. Did it work? Yes, eventually, and now my hands and feet are peeling like I had a bad sunburn. Next chemo treatment, this coming Friday. Will I develop Hand and Foot again? Most llikely. Good thing about that? I have lots of Vitamin B6 and Bag Balm.
Next, as a direct result of the new chemo I'm on disability leave from work. Love being able to sleep late every day, and not have to show up at the office. Disability leave works like this, for the next 16 weeks I will be paid 100% of what I earn when working full time. After that time my earnings go to 50%. I'm struggling with the 100%, when things go to 50% I will have to loose my car and it's huge insurance payment. Also will have to find "creative" ways to lower my daily expenses. Living on 50% of what you're used to isn't a fun thing. I just thank God that I still have some income. So many out there don't.
Yesterday I visited a Kidney specialist. I have a cyst on my kidney. It's about the size of a large melon (16 centimeters) and it also may have cancer in it. Seems there are two ways to find out if there is cancer lurking in there. First is a byopsy (and that isn't a good option here). IF there is a byopsy, it could open my whole body to the cancer there (definitely not a good option). The other option is to remove kidney and cyst. This is what the kidney specialist and my oncologist suggest. Also what I want done. I'm tired of trying to sleep on something that is huge and uncomfortable. Get this ting out! Unfortunately surgery isn't an option until I finish this round of chemo. That is 10/30/09. Then wait at least 3 weeks and build strength to face the knife. After surgery I will need to recoup for at lest 3 weeks, then on to RadiationTherapy. That is IF they don't find cancer in the cyst. If they do, I don't know what the next step will be for sure. Coould be another round of still another chemo drug. All the while my system is going down hill. (Duh, that's what happens when you intentionally poison yourself with all these chemo chemicals.) Good point to this, my nutrition is good and the gastric bypass supplements are righting an uphill battle that they will, most likely, win. (An aside here, I'm 9 pounds from my first goal - 100 pounds lost!)
Good news here is you can live with one kidney. Had offers to "share" from sisters and daughters, and even a couple of friends. It's such a blessing to have such wonderful people in my life. So onward I go, walking beside my Lord Jesus Christ, watching as he works miracle after miracle in my life. I still say that no matter what the outcome of this walk I win! IF I go to be with him I win (in my own extimation), if I stay here I get to spend more time with family and friends and that is also a win situation for me.
A little news on the side, my Mom had a mastectomy 2 years ago for breast cancer, and now my youngest sister has a possible diagnosis of breast cancer as well. Thats Mom and 2 of the 4 sisters. The other two sisters have signed up for Mammograms and Pap smears in the near future. We're waiting for news from them. I've suggested that both my daughters go get them as well. This cancer thing seems to have descended on our family with a vengence. Pray for us, and I'll be back when there is something else to share.
Kate
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
5 Weeks Gone
Five weeks and I’ve been silent. So much has gone on in those five weeks. First, I’m down to 162 as of this morning. That’s just a couple pounds more than I weighed as a Sophomore in High School. Yes, the weight keeps dropping, and not always because of chemo.
I had my latest chemo treatment on the 10th. I have done so well up to that point that people have accused me of not really going through chemo. (Of course they were kidding). Last week (7/13/09) I got sick at work. Around 10 a.m. I was suddenly very nauseous and started dry heaving. That lasted about half an hour. I was so nauseated, and the dry heaves made it worse. I finally gave up and decided to go home around 10:30. I closed my desk and started out of the building. One of my co-workers saw that I was not doing well. She made me promise that I would sit on a bench and wait she was going to drive me home and have someone follow her so she could get back to work. Minutes later she and another coworker were back. They got my car and her car and took me home. That’s where I stayed for the next 6 days. I felt so bad I couldn’t even think of going back to work. I’m so blessed to have a good vacation package from my employer, I didn’t miss any pay, and was able to just concentrate on getting well.
Yesterday I returned to work, feeling weak, but no nausea. I worked the day through with no real problems. Went home and collapsed into my recliner and spent the evening watching DVDs. Today I’m feeling much stronger and not nauseous at all. My strength is returning, and with it my humor. Hooray!
My Bariatric Surgeon had my nutrition tested earlier this month. He says the tests came back good. He wants me to take a little more B complex, but other than that I’m doing great nutritionally. I saw something on-line this morning about a study in England that has shown that chemo patients, and especially those with breast cancer seem to do much better with nutritional supplementation. I’ve been saying all along that the nutrition has helped me, and now, here’s a study that proves me right.
Well, I’m going to say that Chemotherapy, while not fun, isn’t the horrible experience I thought it would be. After nine weeks of chemotherapy, I’ve had one, yes, just one week of discomfort. That’s not a bad average. My appetite is coming back faster and faster after every treatment, and that is helping with my strength as well.
KJ came by last week and got pictures of me after weight loss and hair loss to send to her sister. KL is anxious to see them as she hasn’t seen any of me since I was there over a year ago. She knows I’ve lost weight, but I’m told that if you don’t see it you can’t imagine it. I’m hoping to get copies of the pictures as well so I can put them here and let you all see how much I’ve changed.
Till next time, take care and God Bless.
I had my latest chemo treatment on the 10th. I have done so well up to that point that people have accused me of not really going through chemo. (Of course they were kidding). Last week (7/13/09) I got sick at work. Around 10 a.m. I was suddenly very nauseous and started dry heaving. That lasted about half an hour. I was so nauseated, and the dry heaves made it worse. I finally gave up and decided to go home around 10:30. I closed my desk and started out of the building. One of my co-workers saw that I was not doing well. She made me promise that I would sit on a bench and wait she was going to drive me home and have someone follow her so she could get back to work. Minutes later she and another coworker were back. They got my car and her car and took me home. That’s where I stayed for the next 6 days. I felt so bad I couldn’t even think of going back to work. I’m so blessed to have a good vacation package from my employer, I didn’t miss any pay, and was able to just concentrate on getting well.
Yesterday I returned to work, feeling weak, but no nausea. I worked the day through with no real problems. Went home and collapsed into my recliner and spent the evening watching DVDs. Today I’m feeling much stronger and not nauseous at all. My strength is returning, and with it my humor. Hooray!
My Bariatric Surgeon had my nutrition tested earlier this month. He says the tests came back good. He wants me to take a little more B complex, but other than that I’m doing great nutritionally. I saw something on-line this morning about a study in England that has shown that chemo patients, and especially those with breast cancer seem to do much better with nutritional supplementation. I’ve been saying all along that the nutrition has helped me, and now, here’s a study that proves me right.
Well, I’m going to say that Chemotherapy, while not fun, isn’t the horrible experience I thought it would be. After nine weeks of chemotherapy, I’ve had one, yes, just one week of discomfort. That’s not a bad average. My appetite is coming back faster and faster after every treatment, and that is helping with my strength as well.
KJ came by last week and got pictures of me after weight loss and hair loss to send to her sister. KL is anxious to see them as she hasn’t seen any of me since I was there over a year ago. She knows I’ve lost weight, but I’m told that if you don’t see it you can’t imagine it. I’m hoping to get copies of the pictures as well so I can put them here and let you all see how much I’ve changed.
Till next time, take care and God Bless.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Hi All
I’m sorry it’s been so long since I posted. It wasn’t for things to say, just for the energy to get up and post.
The weight loss is continuing. I’m up to 68 pounds gone now. This morning it was official. I now weigh in at 172, that’s the least I have weighed since 1997. Actually since before that. In 1997 I weighed in at 175 when I came home from Nebraska, and I hadn’t weighed that little since before my kids were born, so it’s been at least since 1977 that I was this light. I gotta tell you that it feels strange. I get dressed in the morning and it takes me at least 3 tries. I go to the closet and choose something, and then put it on only to find when I step in front of the mirror that it’s way too big. So it’s back to the closet again for another try. After 3 tries I go with the last decision and head out the door. Sometimes the clothes fit, but most of the time they are very big on me. I really should go shopping. Just hate to spend money only to have the clothes too big in a couple of weeks. Maybe it’s time to go to Good Will or Salvation Army.
Now to the fight against cancer. The first round of chemo was a real learning experience.
First, the chemo treatment itself isn’t bad. Just like having an IV and they pump you full of anti-nausea drugs first, so you’re already primed to be great when they push the chemo. I had only one problem with nausea and that was because I ate entirely too much one night, and ate it real fast so caused myself some dumping. IF I will stay with the bypass rules I don’t have that problem.
The meds I’m taking seem to keep the worst of the nausea at bay, and that’s great. My only problem during the first round of chemo was to remember when to take the pills. I took some twice daily when I got up and when I went to bed. Only problem with those are when my bed times change. If I go to bed early I have to set an alarm to wake me to take the meds. Getting up isn’t as much of a problem as going to bed early.
Next I have one that must be melted in my mouth. That one seemed to work fine the first day or two, but by the end of the first week it was making me so nauseous to take that one that I quit to see how I would do. I did much better so I decided to ignore that med and I had less problems. When I told my oncologist about that, he said “don’t take them” and I told him I had quit and he said good.
The final med is in pill form and I take two every 6 hours. Now you can’t ask for anything easier than that. At 6 and 12 I take two pills. Easy to remember, easy to do, and I’m usually awake around those times. Nice.
Had my second round of chemo last week on Friday (6/19/09) The port worked well for me that time, and I sat there in the treatment chair, feet up, covered with a warm blanket, a drink by my side, and read a book. Now that truly is easy.
I told my oncologist that if this was what Chemo is all about I could do it with one hand tied behind my back and both eyes closed. He laughed. He does think I’m doing much better than he expected me to. He credits a large part of that to my attitude. I’m very positive about this treatment, and it’s not going to get me down.
I do seem to need more sleep now than I did before starting Chemo. That shows up in days 4 through 14 usually. Then on day 15 I start to regain my strength and want to do something other than sleep. Those 10 days I’m sleeping more than awake. I go to work, get my job done and get home as soon as possible. I stretch out in my recliner, by the fan in my living room and drop right off to sleep. Em wakes me when it’s time to take meds, or go to bed. Otherwise I sleep soundly until the alarm wakes me to go back to work. I’ve even fallen asleep at my desk a couple of times. I told my boss about it, and he’s very understanding.
Only 3 more treatments to go and I will start the Radiation therapy. Have no idea what all that will entail, but I’ve heard more horror stories about the Chemo, so am hopeful that the radiation will go well.
My bariatric surgeon ordered a blood nutrition study last week. I got the results and they were all excellent. Even the oncologist (I showed him a copy) was thrilled. Evidently the supplements are helping keep me going while in Chemo. I’m so blessed that I had that surgery first.
Oh, and I had my first experience with hair loss last week. I ran my fingers through my hair and came out with a hand full of hair. None of that for me! I went to the beauty shop and had my head shaved. I love the bald look, and evidently others think it looks good too. I can’t tell you how many people have said I had the right shaped head to be bald; I even heard from several people that it makes me look younger.
I’m pairing the bald head with chunky earrings and hats and scarves, and having fun with the new look. Only thing I don’t like about being bald is it’s cold. I didn’t realize how much body temperature is regulated by your hair, or lack thereof. Sure my hair was thinning even before Chemo, but now that I have no hair, I notice I’m cold a lot more easily than I used to be.
Well, that’s about all I can share with you right now. Going to be time for a nap real soon.
Kate
I’m sorry it’s been so long since I posted. It wasn’t for things to say, just for the energy to get up and post.
The weight loss is continuing. I’m up to 68 pounds gone now. This morning it was official. I now weigh in at 172, that’s the least I have weighed since 1997. Actually since before that. In 1997 I weighed in at 175 when I came home from Nebraska, and I hadn’t weighed that little since before my kids were born, so it’s been at least since 1977 that I was this light. I gotta tell you that it feels strange. I get dressed in the morning and it takes me at least 3 tries. I go to the closet and choose something, and then put it on only to find when I step in front of the mirror that it’s way too big. So it’s back to the closet again for another try. After 3 tries I go with the last decision and head out the door. Sometimes the clothes fit, but most of the time they are very big on me. I really should go shopping. Just hate to spend money only to have the clothes too big in a couple of weeks. Maybe it’s time to go to Good Will or Salvation Army.
Now to the fight against cancer. The first round of chemo was a real learning experience.
First, the chemo treatment itself isn’t bad. Just like having an IV and they pump you full of anti-nausea drugs first, so you’re already primed to be great when they push the chemo. I had only one problem with nausea and that was because I ate entirely too much one night, and ate it real fast so caused myself some dumping. IF I will stay with the bypass rules I don’t have that problem.
The meds I’m taking seem to keep the worst of the nausea at bay, and that’s great. My only problem during the first round of chemo was to remember when to take the pills. I took some twice daily when I got up and when I went to bed. Only problem with those are when my bed times change. If I go to bed early I have to set an alarm to wake me to take the meds. Getting up isn’t as much of a problem as going to bed early.
Next I have one that must be melted in my mouth. That one seemed to work fine the first day or two, but by the end of the first week it was making me so nauseous to take that one that I quit to see how I would do. I did much better so I decided to ignore that med and I had less problems. When I told my oncologist about that, he said “don’t take them” and I told him I had quit and he said good.
The final med is in pill form and I take two every 6 hours. Now you can’t ask for anything easier than that. At 6 and 12 I take two pills. Easy to remember, easy to do, and I’m usually awake around those times. Nice.
Had my second round of chemo last week on Friday (6/19/09) The port worked well for me that time, and I sat there in the treatment chair, feet up, covered with a warm blanket, a drink by my side, and read a book. Now that truly is easy.
I told my oncologist that if this was what Chemo is all about I could do it with one hand tied behind my back and both eyes closed. He laughed. He does think I’m doing much better than he expected me to. He credits a large part of that to my attitude. I’m very positive about this treatment, and it’s not going to get me down.
I do seem to need more sleep now than I did before starting Chemo. That shows up in days 4 through 14 usually. Then on day 15 I start to regain my strength and want to do something other than sleep. Those 10 days I’m sleeping more than awake. I go to work, get my job done and get home as soon as possible. I stretch out in my recliner, by the fan in my living room and drop right off to sleep. Em wakes me when it’s time to take meds, or go to bed. Otherwise I sleep soundly until the alarm wakes me to go back to work. I’ve even fallen asleep at my desk a couple of times. I told my boss about it, and he’s very understanding.
Only 3 more treatments to go and I will start the Radiation therapy. Have no idea what all that will entail, but I’ve heard more horror stories about the Chemo, so am hopeful that the radiation will go well.
My bariatric surgeon ordered a blood nutrition study last week. I got the results and they were all excellent. Even the oncologist (I showed him a copy) was thrilled. Evidently the supplements are helping keep me going while in Chemo. I’m so blessed that I had that surgery first.
Oh, and I had my first experience with hair loss last week. I ran my fingers through my hair and came out with a hand full of hair. None of that for me! I went to the beauty shop and had my head shaved. I love the bald look, and evidently others think it looks good too. I can’t tell you how many people have said I had the right shaped head to be bald; I even heard from several people that it makes me look younger.
I’m pairing the bald head with chunky earrings and hats and scarves, and having fun with the new look. Only thing I don’t like about being bald is it’s cold. I didn’t realize how much body temperature is regulated by your hair, or lack thereof. Sure my hair was thinning even before Chemo, but now that I have no hair, I notice I’m cold a lot more easily than I used to be.
Well, that’s about all I can share with you right now. Going to be time for a nap real soon.
Kate
Monday, June 1, 2009
First Chemo Down
Well, I had my first chemo last Friday. It took a bit longer than the 3-4 hours I was told. We ran into problems with my medi-port.
For those who don’t know, I have a small appliance under the skin just beneath my left collarbone. It is a Medi-Port. It allows my medical team to start an IV with out having to stick my veins. The doctors want to use this mediport for several reasons.
First, it allows less of a chance for the chemo medicines to spill out on my skin, which is a good thing because it is very toxic. From what I understand if allowed to sit on my skin for any time at all, it would start to eat away my skin. That’s the magic of this chemical combination, it attacks living tissue, the fast growing kind most (which is what cancer is). It also attacks things like hair folicles, they grow constantly and are good targets for takeover. When the hair falls out the follicles go dormant. After the chemo is finished, the follicles wake up and begin growing hair again. Cancer cells grow very fast, and they will react to the chemo and die. This part of my adventure is a balancing act, kinda like a walk across a ravine on a fallen tree. Walk steady and straight, and you get across fine. Pay no attention or go too fast and you stand a bigger chance of falling off.
Second, the appliance that sits under my skin is less likely to get an infection. It’s part of my body in a way and takes care of that problem.
Next it has a longish tube that follows my collarbone over to a rather large vein on my right side, which speeds the chemo to the bloodstream and allows it to work without causing me problems.
When the port is placed and the tube is run, the skin is sutured closed over it. When a patient needs chemo, the tech starts it in the port, but they have to verify placement of the port by first washing it with saline, then attempting to do a draw, which means pull blood out of it. Mine would flush OK,, but they couldn’t get a back flush. Finally after trying several meds to clear the line (none of which worked) we gave up and put the iv into my arm.
The actual receiving of chemo medicines isn’t a big deal. You just get hooked up to IV bags and they drip, drip, drip away. Then the nurse/technician comes over and adds to the IV with two large syringes that push a very strong drug slowly into my veins. Finally another drip, drip, drip bag and I’m done. Came home and had a wonderful day.
Saturday was a good day as well. The prescriptions for anti-nausea drugs worked as it was supposed to and I had almost no nausea at all. Sunday followed suit, with still very little nausea. Today (Monday 6/1/2009) was a bit different. I went back to work, and because I was concentrating on work I was late with my anti-nausea drugs. The nausea hit at lunch when someone warmed a lunch in the microwave and to me it smelled like they were heating old gym shoes….really nasty. I got my anti-nausea drugs out and took them and things got better. By the time I got back to my desk I was sleepy, but no longer nauseous. Hip Hip Horay!
Tomorrow I have an appointment at 9 a.m. to get my medi-port checked. IF it is plugged, they will remove this one and place another. Thankfully it is day surgery and I will be able to go home afterwards. Unfortunately it will use up another full day of vacation, and that’s no fun. I have 96 hours right now, and every hour away counts down, so I’m hoping this will be a 4 hour ordeal rather than the full 8.
I’ve decided that if this is all that Chemo is going to do to me, I’m truly blessed. If not, I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me….
Kate
For those who don’t know, I have a small appliance under the skin just beneath my left collarbone. It is a Medi-Port. It allows my medical team to start an IV with out having to stick my veins. The doctors want to use this mediport for several reasons.
First, it allows less of a chance for the chemo medicines to spill out on my skin, which is a good thing because it is very toxic. From what I understand if allowed to sit on my skin for any time at all, it would start to eat away my skin. That’s the magic of this chemical combination, it attacks living tissue, the fast growing kind most (which is what cancer is). It also attacks things like hair folicles, they grow constantly and are good targets for takeover. When the hair falls out the follicles go dormant. After the chemo is finished, the follicles wake up and begin growing hair again. Cancer cells grow very fast, and they will react to the chemo and die. This part of my adventure is a balancing act, kinda like a walk across a ravine on a fallen tree. Walk steady and straight, and you get across fine. Pay no attention or go too fast and you stand a bigger chance of falling off.
Second, the appliance that sits under my skin is less likely to get an infection. It’s part of my body in a way and takes care of that problem.
Next it has a longish tube that follows my collarbone over to a rather large vein on my right side, which speeds the chemo to the bloodstream and allows it to work without causing me problems.
When the port is placed and the tube is run, the skin is sutured closed over it. When a patient needs chemo, the tech starts it in the port, but they have to verify placement of the port by first washing it with saline, then attempting to do a draw, which means pull blood out of it. Mine would flush OK,, but they couldn’t get a back flush. Finally after trying several meds to clear the line (none of which worked) we gave up and put the iv into my arm.
The actual receiving of chemo medicines isn’t a big deal. You just get hooked up to IV bags and they drip, drip, drip away. Then the nurse/technician comes over and adds to the IV with two large syringes that push a very strong drug slowly into my veins. Finally another drip, drip, drip bag and I’m done. Came home and had a wonderful day.
Saturday was a good day as well. The prescriptions for anti-nausea drugs worked as it was supposed to and I had almost no nausea at all. Sunday followed suit, with still very little nausea. Today (Monday 6/1/2009) was a bit different. I went back to work, and because I was concentrating on work I was late with my anti-nausea drugs. The nausea hit at lunch when someone warmed a lunch in the microwave and to me it smelled like they were heating old gym shoes….really nasty. I got my anti-nausea drugs out and took them and things got better. By the time I got back to my desk I was sleepy, but no longer nauseous. Hip Hip Horay!
Tomorrow I have an appointment at 9 a.m. to get my medi-port checked. IF it is plugged, they will remove this one and place another. Thankfully it is day surgery and I will be able to go home afterwards. Unfortunately it will use up another full day of vacation, and that’s no fun. I have 96 hours right now, and every hour away counts down, so I’m hoping this will be a 4 hour ordeal rather than the full 8.
I’ve decided that if this is all that Chemo is going to do to me, I’m truly blessed. If not, I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me….
Kate
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Tomorrow, Another Big Day
Tomorrow is another big day in my life. After the diagnosis of Invasive Ductile Carcinoma, it seems that everything in my life revolves around cancer…Treatment plans, chemotherapy, radiation treatments, and even surgery. It’s an amazing amount of information to digest, and be able to converse about. Tomorrow I go for my first chemotherapy treatment. I’ve met my Oncologist (a very nice man) and agree with him that treatment should be aggressive, so I opted to start right away.
I’ve been dumbfounded at the number of people in my sphere of influence who have either had breast cancer or know someone who has. Fortunately for my peace of mind they have all survived after various forms of treatment, some for a long while, and others for only a short while. People at work want to tell me about their spouses (usually wives) who have battled this disease and not only survived, but in at least 2 cases, gone on to have additional children and are living fulfilling lives. People at church are the same..survivors. There are 3 people in my Sunday School class who are currently battling other forms of cancer. I feel like I’m in good company.
Over the past 3 days I have received e-mails from many places that all say to me…Hang in there Kate, It’s going to be OK…It’s like God is sending me personal messages of hope and confidence. I don’t remember a time when I felt so supported and loved.
The people around me are positive, and offer me support. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “If there is anything I can do, please call me” or something to that effect. I’m thinking of making a list of chores around the house that I could use help with, and when someone offers that, give them a copy with the advice “IF there is anything on that list that you can do, please don’t hesitate to come by and do it. I’ll need as much support and help as I can get, and I would appreciate your help with any of these things.” That will do three things for me, and at least one thing for each of them. First, it will help me stay focused on what needs to be done, and give me a feeling of control (I can control something). Next it will give well meaning friends and family something concrete they can do to help me, and that will help them feel a part of my healing, without being involved in the “icky” parts. Finally it will get my surroundings cleaned, mowed, washed, swept, or whatever, and that will make me feel better just knowing things look nice. Win/Win situation for everyone!
My weight continues to go down, although not as quickly as before. I’ve begun eating a little more frequently in preparation for the chemo. Everything I’ve read on-line suggests that to combat the negative effects of chemo I should try to eat 4 to 6 times daily, and eat small meals. The small part isn’t hard, and so far the 4 times a day isn’t either. I’m branching out to things like granola bars, and yogurt for the 4th meal. Gives me a variety I didn’t have before. I don’t miss things like that as much. Also, I have a meeting with my Bariatric surgeon this Saturday morning at 8:30 a.m. to discuss my nutrition needs and the differences between eating for chemo and eating for gastric bypass. I know I’ll continue to take my supplements, might even double up on some of them.
I’m not anticipating any real trouble with the chemo. From everything I’ve been told by both friends and my Oncologist, they will give me drugs to counteract the nausea caused by chemo, and (here’s the big one) most of the side effects seem to come in a cumulative way. That is, they may not strike the first treatment, or even the second. We just have to wait and see how things go.
More about all of this during the weekend (I hope) after my first treatment. Then I’ll have something definite to report.
Meanwhile, have a wonderful Friday, and coming weekend.
I’ve been dumbfounded at the number of people in my sphere of influence who have either had breast cancer or know someone who has. Fortunately for my peace of mind they have all survived after various forms of treatment, some for a long while, and others for only a short while. People at work want to tell me about their spouses (usually wives) who have battled this disease and not only survived, but in at least 2 cases, gone on to have additional children and are living fulfilling lives. People at church are the same..survivors. There are 3 people in my Sunday School class who are currently battling other forms of cancer. I feel like I’m in good company.
Over the past 3 days I have received e-mails from many places that all say to me…Hang in there Kate, It’s going to be OK…It’s like God is sending me personal messages of hope and confidence. I don’t remember a time when I felt so supported and loved.
The people around me are positive, and offer me support. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “If there is anything I can do, please call me” or something to that effect. I’m thinking of making a list of chores around the house that I could use help with, and when someone offers that, give them a copy with the advice “IF there is anything on that list that you can do, please don’t hesitate to come by and do it. I’ll need as much support and help as I can get, and I would appreciate your help with any of these things.” That will do three things for me, and at least one thing for each of them. First, it will help me stay focused on what needs to be done, and give me a feeling of control (I can control something). Next it will give well meaning friends and family something concrete they can do to help me, and that will help them feel a part of my healing, without being involved in the “icky” parts. Finally it will get my surroundings cleaned, mowed, washed, swept, or whatever, and that will make me feel better just knowing things look nice. Win/Win situation for everyone!
My weight continues to go down, although not as quickly as before. I’ve begun eating a little more frequently in preparation for the chemo. Everything I’ve read on-line suggests that to combat the negative effects of chemo I should try to eat 4 to 6 times daily, and eat small meals. The small part isn’t hard, and so far the 4 times a day isn’t either. I’m branching out to things like granola bars, and yogurt for the 4th meal. Gives me a variety I didn’t have before. I don’t miss things like that as much. Also, I have a meeting with my Bariatric surgeon this Saturday morning at 8:30 a.m. to discuss my nutrition needs and the differences between eating for chemo and eating for gastric bypass. I know I’ll continue to take my supplements, might even double up on some of them.
I’m not anticipating any real trouble with the chemo. From everything I’ve been told by both friends and my Oncologist, they will give me drugs to counteract the nausea caused by chemo, and (here’s the big one) most of the side effects seem to come in a cumulative way. That is, they may not strike the first treatment, or even the second. We just have to wait and see how things go.
More about all of this during the weekend (I hope) after my first treatment. Then I’ll have something definite to report.
Meanwhile, have a wonderful Friday, and coming weekend.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
A New Road to Walk
Hello from Texas
What a unique greeting, right?
Seems that Kate’s Grand Adventure has taken a turn down a new road. Yes, I’m still dealing with the gastric bypass, and all that means, but I have a new challenge to tackle and subdue, or overcome. Friday I had an appointment with my doctor and I got some “not so good” news. Seems I have something called Invasive Ductile Cancer, or IDC. What that translates to in plain everyday English is Breast Cancer. Mine is “stage 2” which means that my cancer is not only in my right breast, but also in the lymph glands under my right arm.
My breast surgeon (and I never thought I would write that particular phrase) is in a hurry to start treatments since I am at stage 2. She said I’m not stage 1 which is the earliest diagnosis, and means the cancer is only in the milk ducts of the breast and has not spread. Stage 2 means that the cancer has decided to spread out and has invaded at least one lymph node under my right arm. There are two more stages after this, but fortunately for me I got a guilty conscience when my heart doctor lectured me and went for the dreaded mammogram.
I go tomorrow (Monday) to have a port installed in my chest wall just below my collar bone on the left side. This will allow my oncologist (another phrase I didn’t think I’d ever say) to inject the chemo therapy directly above my heart, and that will allow my heart to disperse the chemo more quickly and efficiently. Evidently I am being scheduled for chemotherapy treatments weekly for the next 4 to 6 months. Up side to that is I get to start a new fashion trend at my work. Since I’ll be loosing my hair (at least that’s what the paperwork my doctor gave me said) and I have a whole wardrobe of hats and big earrings, my new look will be hats and gaudy ear rings. Can hardly wait!
After the chemo I will have 6 to 8 weeks of radiation therapy on a daily basis. The paperwork says that this won’t make my hair fall out. Not too sure why she put that since my hair will be gone if not from the chemo then from the bypass! The radiation is, evidently, very finely focused and will only be aimed at 4 to 6 sites within the breast, and several sites in the lymph node.
After these two treatment “Modalities” I will go through several tests including MRI, bone scans, and CT of my chest, abdomen and pelvis. These will be to see if the tumors have been reduced, and to be sure the cancer has not spread to any other sites. These tests may be combined with a newer test called a PET scan, but I’m not too sure about this test. I’ll learn more as time goes by. Other things my doctor is going to be watching is my bone density, I don’t want to develop osteoporosis, and my heart, as evidently chemo and radiation can be heard on the old ticker.
After all these treatments (it looks like at least 6 months to a year of various treatments) I will be evaluated for surgery. If the treatments have successfully reduced the tumors, I may only need what is called a Lumpectomy. That’s where they go in and only remove part of the breast tissue. If not they will do a complete mastectomy. One of the concerns I have is if they only do a lumpectomy, will there still be cancer cells floating around in there that could settle again in my breast? If there is a chance of that happening I’d rather they just take the whole breast.
I’m also thinking about reconstruction. According to my Mother, (who faced most of these questions 2 years ago when she was diagnosed with Cancer), reconstruction is a lot of pain for something you don’t really need (the breast). But then again she is 80, and was 78 when facing those questions. She is also a “mini”, which means that although she is 5’6” she only weighs less than 120 and has never had more than a 36B. I, on the other hand, am 2 inches shorter but have always been buxomy. I asked my surgeon if it was possible to take tissue from my remaining breast (or tummy) and build another breast. I really don’t want silicone. She said that was a possibility. I must admit, I like the idea of being a B cup instead of a DD cup, so IF I decide on reconstruction, that is something I’m going to think about real hard.
According to everything I’ve read so far my attitude can have a very profound impact on my treatments, both in the success and the amount of nausea and pain I encounter. I’ve always been a very positive person so I’m thinking that I’ll not have as much pain, etc as some of the horror stories I’ve heard. Besides my positive attitude, I have a strong support group, and a very strong faith in God. The way I look at it, I’m almost 60 and in those years God has always taken superb care of me. There’s no reason he won’t do so now either.
Before you point out that I have cancer, and some people don’t consider that superb care, I must remind you that everyone has free will. Free Will has as much to do with how we care for our bodies as how we act in other arenas. I looked down a list of things that can contribute to a woman’s chances of getting breast cancer. There were 14 or 15 items on that list, including smoking, overweight, sedentary lifestyle, among other things. On that list I can claim all but one and that was drug usage. So my attitude is, IF I did the crime (not taking care of myself) then I have to pay the time…(or walk the line of cancer therapy).
Lastly for today, I figure that IF the cancer takes my life I’ll be in heaven with my Savior, and that’s a Win situation for me….WHEN I beat the cancer, I get to stay here and have more fun with friends and family…That is also a WIN situation for me. So whatever happens, I’m getting a win/win situation …who can argue with that?
Stay tuned for the next blog. Don’t know for sure when that will be, but I think I may be writing you a bit more often than I did before. Pray for me…I need it and you probably need the practice!
Kate
What a unique greeting, right?
Seems that Kate’s Grand Adventure has taken a turn down a new road. Yes, I’m still dealing with the gastric bypass, and all that means, but I have a new challenge to tackle and subdue, or overcome. Friday I had an appointment with my doctor and I got some “not so good” news. Seems I have something called Invasive Ductile Cancer, or IDC. What that translates to in plain everyday English is Breast Cancer. Mine is “stage 2” which means that my cancer is not only in my right breast, but also in the lymph glands under my right arm.
My breast surgeon (and I never thought I would write that particular phrase) is in a hurry to start treatments since I am at stage 2. She said I’m not stage 1 which is the earliest diagnosis, and means the cancer is only in the milk ducts of the breast and has not spread. Stage 2 means that the cancer has decided to spread out and has invaded at least one lymph node under my right arm. There are two more stages after this, but fortunately for me I got a guilty conscience when my heart doctor lectured me and went for the dreaded mammogram.
I go tomorrow (Monday) to have a port installed in my chest wall just below my collar bone on the left side. This will allow my oncologist (another phrase I didn’t think I’d ever say) to inject the chemo therapy directly above my heart, and that will allow my heart to disperse the chemo more quickly and efficiently. Evidently I am being scheduled for chemotherapy treatments weekly for the next 4 to 6 months. Up side to that is I get to start a new fashion trend at my work. Since I’ll be loosing my hair (at least that’s what the paperwork my doctor gave me said) and I have a whole wardrobe of hats and big earrings, my new look will be hats and gaudy ear rings. Can hardly wait!
After the chemo I will have 6 to 8 weeks of radiation therapy on a daily basis. The paperwork says that this won’t make my hair fall out. Not too sure why she put that since my hair will be gone if not from the chemo then from the bypass! The radiation is, evidently, very finely focused and will only be aimed at 4 to 6 sites within the breast, and several sites in the lymph node.
After these two treatment “Modalities” I will go through several tests including MRI, bone scans, and CT of my chest, abdomen and pelvis. These will be to see if the tumors have been reduced, and to be sure the cancer has not spread to any other sites. These tests may be combined with a newer test called a PET scan, but I’m not too sure about this test. I’ll learn more as time goes by. Other things my doctor is going to be watching is my bone density, I don’t want to develop osteoporosis, and my heart, as evidently chemo and radiation can be heard on the old ticker.
After all these treatments (it looks like at least 6 months to a year of various treatments) I will be evaluated for surgery. If the treatments have successfully reduced the tumors, I may only need what is called a Lumpectomy. That’s where they go in and only remove part of the breast tissue. If not they will do a complete mastectomy. One of the concerns I have is if they only do a lumpectomy, will there still be cancer cells floating around in there that could settle again in my breast? If there is a chance of that happening I’d rather they just take the whole breast.
I’m also thinking about reconstruction. According to my Mother, (who faced most of these questions 2 years ago when she was diagnosed with Cancer), reconstruction is a lot of pain for something you don’t really need (the breast). But then again she is 80, and was 78 when facing those questions. She is also a “mini”, which means that although she is 5’6” she only weighs less than 120 and has never had more than a 36B. I, on the other hand, am 2 inches shorter but have always been buxomy. I asked my surgeon if it was possible to take tissue from my remaining breast (or tummy) and build another breast. I really don’t want silicone. She said that was a possibility. I must admit, I like the idea of being a B cup instead of a DD cup, so IF I decide on reconstruction, that is something I’m going to think about real hard.
According to everything I’ve read so far my attitude can have a very profound impact on my treatments, both in the success and the amount of nausea and pain I encounter. I’ve always been a very positive person so I’m thinking that I’ll not have as much pain, etc as some of the horror stories I’ve heard. Besides my positive attitude, I have a strong support group, and a very strong faith in God. The way I look at it, I’m almost 60 and in those years God has always taken superb care of me. There’s no reason he won’t do so now either.
Before you point out that I have cancer, and some people don’t consider that superb care, I must remind you that everyone has free will. Free Will has as much to do with how we care for our bodies as how we act in other arenas. I looked down a list of things that can contribute to a woman’s chances of getting breast cancer. There were 14 or 15 items on that list, including smoking, overweight, sedentary lifestyle, among other things. On that list I can claim all but one and that was drug usage. So my attitude is, IF I did the crime (not taking care of myself) then I have to pay the time…(or walk the line of cancer therapy).
Lastly for today, I figure that IF the cancer takes my life I’ll be in heaven with my Savior, and that’s a Win situation for me….WHEN I beat the cancer, I get to stay here and have more fun with friends and family…That is also a WIN situation for me. So whatever happens, I’m getting a win/win situation …who can argue with that?
Stay tuned for the next blog. Don’t know for sure when that will be, but I think I may be writing you a bit more often than I did before. Pray for me…I need it and you probably need the practice!
Kate
Monday, May 11, 2009
Returning to work
Good morning and Happy Day after Mother’s Day
I’m sorry I didn’t post last week, but it was an extremely stressful week for me.
First, I returned to work after being off for 5 weeks. If you don’t think that was stressful, try stepping away from your job for 5 weeks with no one filling in and then go back! I had over 1500 e-mails to check out first thing. Almost 90% of those e-mails had to be logged in, and information from them had to be manually copied and posted to various logs. Then I was back only 2 days and I got 2 new projects assigned to me. My Boss told me he had been holding them for when I came back because he knew I could do them with a minimum of supervision, and could provide direction to the others on my team. Gee thanks, Boss!
Actually, returning to work was a wonderful thing, for several reasons. First, because getting out of the house and doing something constructive has made me begin to feel stronger, and my lack of strength was something that was really beginning to bother me. I’ve always been a strong woman, and not being able to do those things that I usually can was bugging me. The other reason, was because it confirmed that I was missed, needed, and still had a job. In these trying economic times that is always a concern.
Went to see my surgeon for my second post-op appointment. He is pleased with my progress overall, but he wants me to get more exercise. I told him that now that I’m back at work I’ll be getting at least 6 blocks of walking in daily. It’s 3 blocks from where I park to my building, so I figure going to and from will be a big improvement. I’m also going this week to check out a new Gym in the neighborhood. It’s called Planet Fitness. The price is right, the location is right, and if it’s pleasing on the inside I’ll probably join just so I have someplace to get some exercise on the weekends. Besides I think I might be a little more consistent with exercise other than walking if I’m paying for it.
Now for the statistics….I’ve lost another inch on my neck, another 2 inches on my hips, but, unfortunately nothing on the waist. Surgeon says that is probably due to the size of the cyst on my kidney. It isn’t shrinking as I loose weight. I can tell the difference between my right and left sides. The cyst makes my left side look larger, and feel harder. The right side really shows the weight loss, and everything seems to be much mushier. You know, when you are heavy your belly feels kinda hard, but when you loose it gets soft and almost mushy? Well I have the hard on the left and the mushy on the right. I haven’t started buying new clothes yet, so you can’t tell, but I can feel it. Surgeon says I should contact my kidney doctor and see about having it drained. The kidney doctor said that was a possibility back last year when I saw him. I may do that, depending on what happens next Friday.
Next Friday has the other stressor for me, and the big news for you. Last Friday I had biopsies taken from my right breast and the lymph node under my arm. This coming Friday I will receive the results on whether or not I have cancer. Strangely I was more afraid of the biopsies than I was of the cancer verdict. I guess that’s because about 30 years ago (when I was pregnant with my younger daughter) the OB/GYN discovered that I had the beginnings of uterine cancer. He wanted me to have an abortion and immediate hysterectomy. I said not only no but HELL NO. I carried my daughter almost full term, but in the 7th month of my pregnancy the cancer started to grow, and we decided to do a hysterectomy near the middle of the 8th month. So I checked into the hospital, and a couple days later I had a beautiful baby girl, and no more baby-factory.
Anyway, I’ve faced the Big C scare already, and weathered the storm. Even more than that, my faith will sustain me. I truly believe that whatever is God’s will for me, will be completed, and I know both from experience and from His Word that He won’t give me more to deal with than I can handle with him. So, next Friday I get the word. Either way, I’m confident that it will work out, and I’m not scared.
Younger daughter LH wants more pictures, and some full body shots, so I’ll try to get someone to take some this week. Then you’all will see what 55 pounds of weight loss looks like on me. Mostly I think it shows in my face, but you will be able to judge.
Till Friday, or perhaps next weekend, I’ll be loosing weight and praising God for ALL his blessings.
Kate
I’m sorry I didn’t post last week, but it was an extremely stressful week for me.
First, I returned to work after being off for 5 weeks. If you don’t think that was stressful, try stepping away from your job for 5 weeks with no one filling in and then go back! I had over 1500 e-mails to check out first thing. Almost 90% of those e-mails had to be logged in, and information from them had to be manually copied and posted to various logs. Then I was back only 2 days and I got 2 new projects assigned to me. My Boss told me he had been holding them for when I came back because he knew I could do them with a minimum of supervision, and could provide direction to the others on my team. Gee thanks, Boss!
Actually, returning to work was a wonderful thing, for several reasons. First, because getting out of the house and doing something constructive has made me begin to feel stronger, and my lack of strength was something that was really beginning to bother me. I’ve always been a strong woman, and not being able to do those things that I usually can was bugging me. The other reason, was because it confirmed that I was missed, needed, and still had a job. In these trying economic times that is always a concern.
Went to see my surgeon for my second post-op appointment. He is pleased with my progress overall, but he wants me to get more exercise. I told him that now that I’m back at work I’ll be getting at least 6 blocks of walking in daily. It’s 3 blocks from where I park to my building, so I figure going to and from will be a big improvement. I’m also going this week to check out a new Gym in the neighborhood. It’s called Planet Fitness. The price is right, the location is right, and if it’s pleasing on the inside I’ll probably join just so I have someplace to get some exercise on the weekends. Besides I think I might be a little more consistent with exercise other than walking if I’m paying for it.
Now for the statistics….I’ve lost another inch on my neck, another 2 inches on my hips, but, unfortunately nothing on the waist. Surgeon says that is probably due to the size of the cyst on my kidney. It isn’t shrinking as I loose weight. I can tell the difference between my right and left sides. The cyst makes my left side look larger, and feel harder. The right side really shows the weight loss, and everything seems to be much mushier. You know, when you are heavy your belly feels kinda hard, but when you loose it gets soft and almost mushy? Well I have the hard on the left and the mushy on the right. I haven’t started buying new clothes yet, so you can’t tell, but I can feel it. Surgeon says I should contact my kidney doctor and see about having it drained. The kidney doctor said that was a possibility back last year when I saw him. I may do that, depending on what happens next Friday.
Next Friday has the other stressor for me, and the big news for you. Last Friday I had biopsies taken from my right breast and the lymph node under my arm. This coming Friday I will receive the results on whether or not I have cancer. Strangely I was more afraid of the biopsies than I was of the cancer verdict. I guess that’s because about 30 years ago (when I was pregnant with my younger daughter) the OB/GYN discovered that I had the beginnings of uterine cancer. He wanted me to have an abortion and immediate hysterectomy. I said not only no but HELL NO. I carried my daughter almost full term, but in the 7th month of my pregnancy the cancer started to grow, and we decided to do a hysterectomy near the middle of the 8th month. So I checked into the hospital, and a couple days later I had a beautiful baby girl, and no more baby-factory.
Anyway, I’ve faced the Big C scare already, and weathered the storm. Even more than that, my faith will sustain me. I truly believe that whatever is God’s will for me, will be completed, and I know both from experience and from His Word that He won’t give me more to deal with than I can handle with him. So, next Friday I get the word. Either way, I’m confident that it will work out, and I’m not scared.
Younger daughter LH wants more pictures, and some full body shots, so I’ll try to get someone to take some this week. Then you’all will see what 55 pounds of weight loss looks like on me. Mostly I think it shows in my face, but you will be able to judge.
Till Friday, or perhaps next weekend, I’ll be loosing weight and praising God for ALL his blessings.
Kate
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
